We were finally given our proper timetables
on Monday so we have just finished our first week as official teachers. I’m teaching Pre KG & LKG, 1st
Standard, 3RD Standard, 5th Standard Science and 6th
and 7th Standard drawing, craft and dance. Sarah’s teaching UKG, 2nd Standard
and 4th and 5th.
And then we’re both teaching 8th, 9th and 10th
Standard drawing, craft and dance.
My day starts with LKG who are the
youngest, about 4. They are lovely. So cute.
I could actually sit and watch them all day because they are
hilarious. One wee boy just sat and
played with his handkerchief all day.
Like actually all day. I have no
idea what amusement he got from it, but he really did. I watched another wee boy determinedly try
and put his belt around his. He kept
trying for ages but couldn’t manage it.
He then thought that it would be easier to put it around his friend’s
head, who, at the time, was furiously trying to rub out his hand with a rubber…
And they sit and play with their bags, it actually keeps them amused for a good
half hour. It’s wonderful. It’s just a lovely way to start the day. Nice and easy. And I hardly teach because the teachers in
there are so good and they have everything sorted so all I have to do it play
with the kids are make sure they don’t die from putting their bags around their
necks and pulling.
The older classes are a little bit harder
though. But I’ve discovered that bribery
works a treat. It’s just a shame it’s
frowned upon everywhere but in a classroom to control children.. I’ve made some star charts and if they’re
good, they get a star. If they’re quiet,
they get a star. If they’re work is
good, they get a star. If they sing
well, they get a star. If they don’t hit
their friend, they get a star. That kind
of thing. I also have a chipmunk cuddly
toy that is working so well. If they are
extra good, they get to have the chipmunk on their desk. They love it.
They really do. They cradle it
and make squeaky noises and pet it. And
everyone wants it. “IF YOU ARE GOOD (I
have to shout because the class is always so noisy until you promise them
something) AND QUIET AND FINISH YOU’RE
WORK, THEN YOU MIGHT GET THE CHIPMUNK,” has become a common phrase. I’m convinced I am losing my voice because of
all the shouting and singing and breathing in car fumes I’m doing. I go through two massive bottles of water
every day at school. There’s one wee boy, Stanley (or Kven, I don’t
know. He answers to both and sometimes
writes one on his sheets, sometimes writes the other) who I have turned into an
absolute angel using the star charts. He
always sits quiet, with his finger over his lips, listens to me, watches me and
does his work so well. But today, one of
the teachers asked him if he understood me and he shook his head. The poor boy has no idea what I’m saying but
he knows to shut up and he gets stickers and occasionally a chipmunk. (which
they call squirrels, and they’re wrong.)
At the moment I’m currently trying to fend
off Valdus/Spiderman because he keeps trying to touch my laptop and it being a
touchscreen is a real issue. He also
keeps picking things up and handing them to me.. I’ve just been handed a water
bottle, a pack of cards, some cream, a chocolate wrapper and right now a shell
necklace. He’s now doing the alphabet
repeatedly. He’s just put a loom band on
my water bottle.
I’ve shown the kids pictures of my family
and they’ve all said you all look lovely and beautiful. They are always so curious about your family
and ask so many questions about everyone.
I am permanently being interrogated by 8 year olds.
Teaching has brought to my attention how
much I don’t really know about stuff. I
can’t teach the older classes maths because I just can’t do it. And by older classes I mean anyone past the
age of 8. I’m also struggling with the
English. I don’t know what half the
proper terms are. It’s really
confusing. And HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN WHAT A
VOWEL IS!?!?! Before I teach science I
have to google it, because it turns out I know nothing about growing crops, or
insecticides..
The kids just don't understand some of the time
For the older classes, 6th, 7th,
8th, 9th and 10th we’ve to do drawing, craft
and dance. Now.. If you know me, you’ll
know that this is a very better bad idea because I can’t do any of the
above. At all. I was advised not to take art and I dance
like my dad. (sorry) So this is going to be very fun. At the moment, we’re just letting them draw
on the board from a book for very small children so they may get a bit bored of
that.. I am going to have to practice my craft skills but I don’t think I can
do much about my drawing. Or my
dancing. Which is just some kind of
bobbing at the moment.
I feel like I’m an official teacher now
because I have had my first parent’s day.
We were told that the parents would come and speak to us after they had
spoken to the teacher but maybe only about 3 came to speak to me. And it was an issue because of the
language. A lot of the parents don’t
speak English very well so it’s down to the kids to translate. It does prove really how good the kids are
at English but I’m never sure if I’m being translated correctly. One of the parents came along without their
child and that made it really hard because it turns out that I don’t know all
the kids names so when he said who his daughter was I just had to make some
stuff up. I hope it was right… Because I
can’t put faces to names very well. So
his daughter was “quite good in class” and “worked hard most of the time” which
to be fair, goes for most of the kids.
So I don’t know what he went away from that thinking.
Most of the kids are really lovely (they’re
even better when you’re not teaching them) but the main issue is they won’t
shut up! They are constantly talking to
me, each other, themselves despite me telling them to shut it, but more
politely. Whenever they want my
attention the either get out of their seats, grab my arm or shout at me. “Miss, Miss, Ma’am, Miss, Ma’am, Ma’am,
MISSMISSMISSMISS, Ma’aaaaam, Miss, me Miss, Miss, MA’AM, MIIIIISSSSSS” It’s one of the most annoy things because it’s
usually about eight of them doing it at once and three more practically
standing on your toes waving in your face.
“I will get to you, if you just sit yourself down and shut yourself
up.” Luckily the older classes don’t
shout, they just crowd round you so much that I’m glad I’m not claustrophobic
or I may have fainted about 23 times by now.
A wee boy called me Mum today by
accident. Not even one of the youngest,
it was a boy in 5th standard who is 11. It was one of the funniest things. It was so sweet. He just did it so innocently, he was handing
me his work and he just said “mine, mummy.”
We both realised what he had said at the exact same time and the look on
his face was priceless. He just looked at
me in horror while I just started to laugh! And then he was like “miss….” and
quickly sat down again. Luckily it was
only me and him who had noticed it so the rest of the class had no idea why we
were laughing for ages.
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